Crocs Balls: The Dumbest Thing Money Can Buy

{10 Comments}

Some of you might be heard of various strange Crocs accessories, but this time the dumbest possible product has caught our attention – testicles for your Crocs! That’s right, you can actually purchase attachable balls for your comfy Crocs and walk around like a total moron! Several different color options and shapes are available on Amazon. We truly live in an amazing time!

Crocs balls.

This would be a perfect gift for someone who has everything. With an added value of polluting the planet with even more cheap plastic crap so turtles and baby seals have something to choke on. You don’t even have to buy them, you can get them by printing these testicles on your 3D printer (if you have one). Should be simple enough.

Crocs balls.

The idea of attaching balls to Crocs probably comes from truck nuts. You’ve probably heard of truck nuts by now, or, if you live anywhere with lots of trucks, surely you’ve seen them in all of their naked glory. They’re especially popular with rednecks, since they consider it peak humor.

Crocs balls.

Crocs balls.

Crocs balls.

In case you want to participate in this crime against footwear and common sense, you can get your pair of Crocs testicles on Amazon. Please note that this site is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.

10 Comments…

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  1. ‘Murica. Prude as f…k but look, balls. Hehehehihihigiggle.

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  2. Poignant Peter November 8, 2022

    Great way to get a blister on the back of your feet. I want some.

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  3. Croc Balls are a brasillian times classier than those “let’s go blow Brandon!” peckerwoo deflators that are all the rage among NASCAR suck ups.

    • Russians just admitted they are in bed with the Republicans. You sold yourself to the Kremlin, comrade.

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  4. History buff November 8, 2022

    The old saying is, “Grow a pair”. This is probably one of the few options
    for weak males.
    You know society has a problem when 15% of males are too old to mate,
    15 to 20% have joined the other side, 10% can’t get laid because they are
    just to weird to attract a woman, 10 % have been clipped, and 10 % have
    medical issues. Now we have 35% remaining, but 5% of these fellows are
    in prison, or remand facilities, 5% have mental issues which will be passed
    on too the child, 5% have medical issues that will be passed on to the child,
    and 5% will leave mixed race kids all over the country, and of course will not
    support them financially or mentally. Whew! The remaining few will be under
    pressure to have sufficient children, or the government will be under immense
    pressure to allow larger than ever immigration. Unfortunately this immigration
    will be of poor quality due to lack of financial resources, education, or poor
    physical/mental health.
    Russia, and partners are laughing at the pathetic situation we have allowed
    ourselves to be in. They don’t have to attack us, just sit back and wait for our
    own self destruction.
    . “

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    • I suck at math. What are you trying to say?

    • Russia, China and the rest of the world laughs at you because you vote for imbaciles like Trump and the obviously unconstitutional GOP party and their anti-American policy.
      All other “problems” you listed are just in your head. Implanted by GOP propaganda. All other developed countries have the same situation and are doing well. Because their government work and people concentrate on real problems. But, hey, I guess managing the real problems is communism, right?
      People like you are the reason America is spiraling downwards. Not childless nerds, gays, your racist definition of relationships or immigrants.

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  5. I understand it’s the incubation temp that determines whether your crocs will have balls. 👩‍🔬

  6. Why are there no Crocs labia?

  7. I have those for a key chain.

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