Fake Tongue To Lick Your Cat: Yes, It’s a Real Product

Here’s a strong contester for the 2023 “Totally Useless & Embarrassing Product Of The Year” award: fake tongue to lick your cat. This is how you use it: you hold in your mouth and use it by fake licking your cat with each stroke of fake tongue sticking out of your mouth. Not only does this definitely not work at all in regards to actually washing your cat (not just pissing him off), but also just makes you look like a complete idiot while using it, so it’s 100% a lose-lose situation.

You have to bite down to hold onto the fake tongue, that’s how it stays in your mouth. To use it simply approach your cat with a the fake tongue in your mouth and ease into a slow licking movement on their head or back while they’re sleeping or in an otherwise pleasant mood (so your cat don’t bite your face off). Since for cats it’s mutually beneficial to be licked, don’t be surprised if they start licking you back… while thinking that you have finally completely lost your mind.

This strange and useless thing is available on Amazon. Please note that this site is reader-supported. When you buy through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission. As an Amazon Associate we earn from qualifying purchases.