Read 15 Classic Books In Just 1 Minute!

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  1. Bubba and Joe Bob February 27, 2017

    Me and Joe Bob had to read all them books in the 5th grade. We read the comic book versions. It’s funnier when ya draw mustaches on some of the pitchers.

  2. In The Christmas Carol is that 5 degrees Fahrenheit or Celsius? I hate when condensed stories leave out important details.

  3. Funny that the Socio-Dem Maoist welfare thugs running this site would leave out THE BIBLE. Let’s try that one, snowflakes:
    “Two liberals are forced to actually WORK for a living after the WOMAN forgets her place and disobeys the rules of the house. Stuff is messed up for thousands of years until a blue-eyed WHITE MAN*, a self-employed carpenter with a SEP IRA, becomes a highly successful motivational speaker calling for private-sector, faith-based distribution of fish and bread (no government cheese handouts!), while NOT calling for extravagant minimum wages for baristas and multiculturalist transgender refugee anchor babies, “Oh-Buy-My-Care” health insurance coverage for parasites too lazy to have inherited trust funds, or oppressive capital gains taxation on job-creator Republicans. Leftist Jews kill him.”
    *Google the paintings and weep, libtards.

    • You left out: Exodus 21:7 “When a man sells his daughter as a slave, she shall not go out as the male slaves do.”

    • In the words of Carson Wells, “Do you realise how crazy you are?”

  4. Don’t steal or kill!
    Or do.
    We don’t really care.
    If someone revenges it, well, your fault for not being more careful. Or they are too crafy.
    We don’t care. Let’s go rafting.
    Pofigism Church. We really, really don’t give ****s about you.

  5. The only one that’s remotely accurate and funny is Dante’s Inferno. It’s spot on, 100% accurate in letter and spirit of the book. The rest of them are vaguely accurate, ball park accurate…if you include the parking lot.

  6. To Romeo and Juliet, add…
    “(Kills herself.)”
    THE END.

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